Posted in March 2011

eight

** Eight. My God, how did we get to eight? It’s been a ride, hasn’t it, baby girl? Yes, I’m still going to call you baby girl. Sorry, honey, but eight ain’t gonna change that. Heck, eighty won’t change that either. You will ALWAYS be your mama’s baby girl. As I snuck into your room … Continue reading

the crocus

I have too much to write. Too many thoughts hurdling off in wildly different directions in my head. Too much urgency. Mr. President, PLEASE. Anything. Dye the damn dog blue. At this point I’ll take it. Just a sign. PLEASE, sir, we need this. Too much angst. Budgets slashed and tensions rising. Please, school districts, … Continue reading

you tell em, buddy boy

“Brooke, honey,” I asked, “Do you remember how we talked about autism?” “Yeah,” she said to her chair. I knew her heart wasn’t in it, but at least she answered without prompting. That’s something. “Do you remember that Mama said that you have autism?” “Yeah.” Clearly I’d have to proceed without a lot of encouragement. … Continue reading

sister friends

“Katie, are we sisters or friends?” “Both, Brooke.” ~ Sunday morning ** Brooke and I were attempting a surgical strike, but I knew it would never work out that way. Our last stop of the day was the big commercial craft store. We needed just one thing – ribbon for the party favors. Nearly everything … Continue reading

when cuteness attacks

I’m exhausted. Scrapping to get my kid what she needs? Easy. Bring it on. Fighting with diplomacy and restraint to bring the message to a MUCH wider audience? Utterly exhausting. Digging deep to find grace when all you want to do is lash out and btch-slap some common sense into someone? Draining as all get … Continue reading

dear oprah

** They give you two thousand characters. Not words, characters. That includes spaces and line breaks, ellipses and apostrophes. It includes quotation marks and dashes, periods and exclamation marks. The whole kit and caboodle. And let me tell you, two thousand characters ain’t much. It takes me two thousand characters to say, “Hi, my name … Continue reading

babe

** We had arrived at school early for Brooke’s parent-teacher (and aide) conference. But for a few staff members preparing for the open, the halls were deserted. Luau, Katie and I stood by as Brooke began her morning locker routine. She sat on the floor, opened her backpack and took out her folder. After three … Continue reading

be different

** “Individuals are labeled different, geeky, abnormal or even Aspergian or Autistic at a young age. Among other things, these labels suggest that the people around them – their friends, family, teachers and counselors – can’t relate to their actions and expressions. That’s understandable, but it doesn’t mean that those actions aren’t motivated by legitimate … Continue reading

i’m crying

“The one redeeming feature of this evening is that, for all intents and purposes, it’s over. Autism – one. My family – none. God, this just sucks sometimes.” ~ My Facebook status last night ** We’ve just finished dinner. Brooke struggled at the restaurant, and though she got it together, she’s been walking the edge … Continue reading

to those who ask why

** Hello. I came across your blog on facebook; a friend of mine that has a son with Autism posted and I read it. Then read some more and cried. I do not have a child with a disability but I know LOTS who do. I never really understood what a parent of a child … Continue reading